How “TO BE OR NOT TO BE” happy

I just read this article about the ten things you should stop doing to be happy, and they are all good things to know, I guess… It may be worth a quick read, but incase you don’t feel like it let me paraphrase it for you. To be happy stop: blaming, impressing, clinging, interrupting, whining, controlling, criticizing, preaching, dwelling, or fearing. I am not saying I disagree with any of them and for the sake of full disclosure my current negative attitude about this advice just might be coming from some momentary negative lapse into a jaded perspective. I apologize for my lapse but a negatively worded article about how to be happy just struck me as odd at best and seriously flawed at worst. I personally hate to be so negative but I believe it falls short for a couple of reasons. My first thought as I read it was “wow…just 10 things… REALLY?”…That’s great news and certainly not as bad as I once thought! But seriously does that sound right to you? I can personally think of a hundred things… well, maybe not a hundred but at least twenty things I should stop doing and most are not even on this list! I am sure we can all think of many things we should change for our own good and most would greatly improve our level of happiness, our health, and even our wealth, but I don’t think anyone will find their unique circumstance in a somewhat negatively phrased, incomplete 400 word article. Now let me tell you how I really feel about it. I also thought some of the suggestions are a little too obscure or abstract, and a few of the others would probably require years of Freudian style psychoanalysis for anyone to really change their behavior. I would also suggest that as well-meaning as the advice is most experts in the field of positive psychology would agree that focusing on the negative aspects of your life is not the way to find happiness. So I would recommend, if it wasn’t such an oxymoron, that the author add “don’t focus on the negative” as number eleven to the list of ten-plus-one things to stop doing if you want to be happy.




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